There is an old saying that “You can choose your friends but you can't choose your family.” The implication being that one does not necessarily always like the members of one's family.
Upon reaching what the kids think is adulthood, a large number of children decide that they do not respect their parents, do not agree with much of their parents' wisdom, don't have to obey their parents' wishes or rules, and in fact many kids actually go so far as to start disliking their parents immensely. There is no doubt that in some (perhaps many) cases the kids are right, and they have come to a responsible and reasonable decision. Their parents are addicted to drugs or alcohol, have regularly employed physical violence against the kids, are not hard workers, are unmotivated, and are not able to set goals and then follow through consistently to achieve them.
This kids-dislike-parents phenomenon is well documented and publicized.
What is not so well publicized is that many parents feel much the same way about their kids. When parents realize that their 30-something is still working on getting a four year college degree, is dishonest, rude and arrogant, mostly just enjoys listening to rock music and taking drugs, is not into satisfactorily pursuing a career, and that their child not only dislikes them but their values too, it is entirely appropriate for the parent to come to the conclusion that one doesn't like what this child-person has morphed into.
When a child is still young enough to change a parent has the obligation to continue doing everything possible to help this young person become a responsible adult. But once the kid reaches age 30 all bets are off. Ben Franklin didn't like his son at all, and he was totally estranged from him. Other examples are not difficult to find. It is a pity, but this sometimes happens. Perhaps sometimes when it does it is because the parent has such a strong personality that their kid has no choice but to divorce himself entirely from the parent in order to find his own way.
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